The Walking Dead

This Sunday. It's AWESOME. How awesome? Best hour of classic zombie anything this decade. This is standard zombie fare mind you, you have heard this story before but The Walking Dead is so well done that it's easily overlooked. There is no forced action or dialogue, nothing to distract from the story. Perfectly paced and genuinely scary, I was delighted to see a decent budget put to good use. These are almost Romero quality zombies and I wonder how far they can push the gore. With such talent in the makeup department it would be a shame if they never get to show off. Anywho enjoy the pics.

Survival of the Dead

Most zombie movies are total garbage, as a zombie movie fan I have become accustomed to seeing box covers with things like "ZOMGBBQ ITS LIKE DAWN OF THE DEAD BUT SOOO MUCH BETTER" on them only to find out its worse than a lifetime original. No I do not want to watch druids fighting zombies, no you cant kill a zombie with a nun chuck, and no Survival of the dead, zombies do not ride horses nor can the be killed with a hot dog skewer. For every good thing Survival does it turns around and does something terrible. In the first 10 minutes we are treated to a great scene where people shoot their infected family members then we get gag like head shots, there is an awesome scene with a guy swimming across a shallow lake with zombies on the bottom only to have the tough male bad ass character light a zombie on fire, light his cigarette on the burning corpse then kung fu kicks that said zombie off the side of a boat. Why? No idea and the movie is full of moments like this. Survival never tries to hide the fact that its a western, at no point is it ever subtle but that's OK, it gives the film an energy that Diary of the Dead severely lacked. The acting is that of a typical Romero film, sparks of genius and incompetence but fairly steady when no one is zinging the undead with one liners. Now what really matters in a zombie movie is the gore but I'm afraid to say the man that pioneered shock is nowhere to be found here. There are a couple good face munches and a spinal cord here and there but the zombies feel awkward and non threatening. I am not a fan of this thinking zombie plot he has going on, it worked in Day and has progressively become worse with each film. I will say it again, ZOMBIES DO NOT RIDE HORSES, ZOMBIES DO NOT REMEMBER ANYTHING OTHER THAN WHERE YOU LIVE SO THEY CAN EAT YOU AND YOUR FAMILY. Where the hell is my sequel to the remake of Dawn of the Dead?
6.5/10

The Crimson Permanent Assurance and Treevenge

The Crimson Permanent Assurance is a short film that plays before Monty Python's The Meaning of Life. This is one of the funniest things I have ever seen in my life. On the Opposite end of the spectrum but equally as entertaining is my new Christmas favorite Treevenge. Nothing like buckets of tree on human gore to brighten the holidays. These two Short films will take up as much time as a few sitcoms so sit down, get on youtube or google and enjoy.

Collapse

If you are new to the concept of peak oil this movie will scare the daylights out of you. If you are familiar with peak oil this movie will scare the daylights out of you. Collapse is an intimate and engaging interview with activist Michael Ruppert on the subject of the world energy crisis. Regardless of whether or not Ruppert is a conspiracy theorist, what the man has to say is chilling. I'm familiar enough with the issue to be interested but I cant say that I'm an expert on the subject which sort of leaves me at the mercy of the two camps. If this guy is correct we are all screwed beyond or wildest dreams, if he is just a wacko I have lost sleep over nothing. Though what makes this movie so scary is that Rupert does not off come off as an extremist but a well educated and concerned citizen. Collapse will make you think really hard about the way we live and how fragile we have become as a species. I wont be shaking this one off anytime soon this is either an amazing work of fiction or the prophecy of our demise.
10/10

Quiet Family

I love my library. Their foreign film selection rivals that of the Internet and tops it in terms of quality. That being said 9 times out of 10 I have no idea what I am getting myself into because their movie list is usually in a different language.

Little did I know that I had ordered this great little horror comedy debut from the director of A Tale of Two Sisters, one of my favorite movies ever. The beginning feels a lot like The Happiness of the Katakuris (it predates Katakuris by 3 years), a dysfunctional family buys a lodge in the mountains and hilarity ensues as the guests keep dying and the family struggles to hide the bodies in the surrounding area. The film successfully transitions from silly to intense and has a pretty awesome soundtrack. Quiet Family borderlines on greatness, its well made and the acting is great it just lacks the kind of punch I need in a horror or comedy.
7.983/10
Sorry for the poor quality of this review my girlfriend is trying to feed me her left over breakfast and I don't want it... I mean I'm just not in the mood for peanut butter toast you know?

Night of the creeps

Oh night of the creeps, yours is the template for literally thousands of unworthy horror "films'. Whether it be a fast talking detective who plays by his own rules, the lovable dork getting the girl, or that said girl torching infected frat boys with a flame thrower. Is it just me or does 1986 seem like the dark ages from this side of the information age? Holy shit that's the year I was born... Any who this little 80's horror gem is the kind of flick only horror fans will watch and that's a shame. This movie just begs to be watched with friends and beer. Its so delightfully bad and at times equally good, good of course being up for debate. Any film where a prom couple fights side by side, blowing off heads and then lighting them on fire is a fucking winner in my book. Sure you have to get through some awkwardness but it's lovable rather than trashy. The acting is sincere (minus the frat boys) and the horror/gore/action while sparse holds up fairly well and is just a blast.
Horror and B movie fan 8.5/10
Everyone else 6/10
Similar films: Slither

Kicking it off with Onibaba

Even without multimillion dollar budgets Japanese directors like Hiroshi Teshigahara, Kurosawa and Kaneto Shindô manage to do what all those dollars can not. Make a film human. Kaneto Shindô's film drips with raw human emotion. The characters lust and desperation are tangible and terrifying.The sound in this movie is key; whether it be the eerie silence of the wind whispering in the grass, or Hikaru Hayashis psychedelic free jazz it always adds the perfect sinister edge. The swaying grass fields perfectly depict the torment of emotion as the 3 main characters struggle for even the most simple of lifes pleasures.
There are these few magnificent scenes were the camera peaks trough the tall grass, allowing us to join in on private matters. I always got this feeling of being watched and hunted. The dark eroticism burns up the screen in a way that transcends all cultural barriers.Extremely claustrophobic, this is a dark little gem of human fears and desires. Acting, lighting, setting, and story at its best.
9.8/10
Similar films: Woman in the Dunes
IN MY PERSONAL TOP 10

P.S. This is my first time writing in a long time so I hang on my writing will improve! (depending on my beer intake)